“For there is always light,
if only we’re brave enough to see it
If only we’re brave enough to be it”
–from 2021 Inaugural poem ‘The Hill We Climb’ by Amanda Gorman
The last time I felt this kind of hope watching an inauguration, I was sitting in a crowd (oh, to remember what sitting in a crowd felt like!) in a hall that, to me, might as well of been in a different country. It was January 20, 2009. The first black president of the United States was taking his oath, and I sat on the floor of the basketball court at TSU (Tennessee State University), a historically black school. I had helped with a joint Martin Luther King Jr. worship service two days before with one historically black and one historically white church. During which many black members exclaimed their surprise that Obama had won because ‘white people must have voted for a black man’ for that to happen, while looking at me quizzically until I said, “I voted for him. “ I did not add that Obama’s white grandparents took him to a church like mine because I was not yet sure what would be considered polite in their church, which was culturally very different than mine. They invited me to watch the inauguration with them at the college in the heart of the city’s carefully red-lined black neighborhood just a few blocks from their church.
The gathering at TSU was structured around unfamiliar rituals that alerted me that I did not know how to be a good guest there, either. There did not appear to be anything like a separation of church and state in this state school’s invocation, and the student council was identified by their sororities and fraternities, which were honored in a way unfamiliar to me. I was fairly sure that I was the only person in the hall of thousands that did not know “Lift Every Voice and Sing” - introduced as the African American National Anthem - by heart. But I was one with the others as we watched the ceremony in Washington DC live on a huge screen, hearts swelling with hope and tears in our eyes.
During the next ten years, I learned about the power of those sororities as they effectively campaigned for a woman whom I supported running for city council, their sorority sister. I learned to sing at least the first verse of ‘Lift Every Voice and Sing’ by heart and from the heart. I built relationships with people by working with them to change city policies, which were built on centuries of racism so blatant that even I could see them. I learned to follow their lead instead of trying to lead but was effective in what they asked me to do because I had power as a white community leader. I was always learning about this part of American culture so unfamiliar to me, mostly by discovering that it was OK to make mistakes if I listened to their feedback and tried to change my behavior. I learned that the feedback was a gift, a blessing, that was given only because we had built trust over the years. Together we had some wins and some losses. Having a black president did not lessen the systemic racism in our city. Change depended on work right there. Doing that work year after year kept the hope alive that I had felt during the inauguration in 2009. I know that the trust I earned was always suspect because as a white ally from ‘somewhere else,’ I could leave any time and that I broke that hard-won trust when I did leave by going ‘home’ back north upon retirement. I grieve losing that trust.
Yesterday I celebrated the inauguration of the first woman vice-president, who is also the first black and south Asian vice-president, whose sorority from her historically black college effectively campaigned for her. I asked my husband and our family pod to watch it together. We were not in a crowd. We celebrated with rituals culturally familiar to us white folk. But like that day 12 years ago, our hearts swelled with hope, and tears watered our eyes. I know that hope will only stay alive if I learn to work for anti-oppressive policies in my new locality. I have a lot to learn.
What inspires the light of hope for positive change in your heart? What keeps it alive? Do you have sororities, fraternities, and/or circles of trust or allies? How do you find them? Do you need to explore your community? Show up in uncomfortable places? Listen? What are you learning? What helps you be brave enough to be the light?